Sloth-Induced Panic Attack, Starring Kristen Bell

That Kristen Bell is adorable is a given fact. That she is positively obsessively in love with sloths is a much lesser known fact, or rather was lesser known until her recent appearance on Ellen.

Props to her for seeing the humor in her hysterical and uncontrollable reaction and deciding it was worth sharing.

Zach McGowan’s ‘Shameless’ Nudity

Last night on Shameless, (a very good show which I don’t happen to watch, airing Sundays on Showtime) there were some gratuitous cock shots all before the episode hit the 10 minute mark! I decided to hunt it down after hearing about it and create some gifs for your viewing pleasure.

The actor in question is Zach McGowan. I’ve never heard of him before, but with a dick like that, he’s certainly on my radar now. I love Emmy Rossum’s expression. I’d be impressed too if I were that close to it. I mean, it’s not just me, right? It looks really big from that side angle. And it bounces so nicely in that third clip.

Wacky Waving Flailing Naked Bubble-Bouncing Tube Man!

Okay, so he’s not really a “tube man,” but he certainly bounces around with the limpest vigor he can manage! If you need a great time-waster, spend your time with this guy.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Ball-bouncingly fun!

 

Conan got humped by a geek.

The geek in question is Stephen Merchant, co-creator of The Office (the original) and Extras. He explains how tough it is as a 6’7″ man, when the average British lady is 5’4″ for sex to occur. In this scenario, Conan drops to his knees to be an “average British Lady.”

By the way, if you happen to be in LA as you’re reading this, Stephen is performing at Largo tonight through the 19th. Go check him out!

SOPA has been shelved!

Major success today, internet users!

SOPA has been tabled for now, effectively stopping the existing bill. Don’t expect the issue to die, but this is still a resounding success for online privacy rights. PIPA still exists, but still.

Read more below:

Political Animal – Putting SOPA on a shelf.

Truthful Movie Posters

If the rest of this year’s movie posters told the truth – Movie Feature – TheShiznit.co.uk

“But with Gwenyth Paltrow as the AIDS monkey.”

“sparklygaywad.com”

#truthinadvertising

Music Monday: Lana Del Rey

I know I featured her breakout hit “Video Games” last October when it overtook the internet, but I’m going to delve a little deeper into the Del Rey Kool-Aid today. She’s been getting nothing but shade since her performance on Saturday Night Live this weekend. “She doesn’t even have an album yet!” they screamed. “She’s a studio-bred hack!” they hollered. “She couldn’t carry a goddamn tune in a bucket!” “Yo, she’s pitchy, dawg!” Faggots everywhere were crawling out of the woodwork to denounce the sensationalized songstress.

I’ll concede that, sure, her performance was awkward and a bit vocally frantic. But it also wasn’t the least bit surprising. Ever since she exploded onto the blogosphere last fall, I’ve been doing my fair share of digging to find what information and performance material I could. What I found was an augmented beauty (I mean, those lips weren’t the ones god gave her, but they’re certainly flattering to her image) who gets anxious in front of large crowds. She enjoys smaller, intimate settings. She reminds me much of the type of musical performer I myself happen to be. I’m decent in front of three people. I’m shite in front of 5+. But Lana is 25 years old. She’s just getting the hang of this whole “mass amounts of people want to see me perform live and do everything perfect” jive. Personally, I find it refreshing that she’s not singing to a backing track, that she doesn’t have her act perfected, that she doesn’t know what to do with her free hand.

At any rate, take a listen to a few of these tracks released some time back while Lana was still in the Lizzy-to-Lana transition phase. She was born Elizabeth (Lizzy) Grant, but her new musical persona is part of the whole performance. Before you start on some “how in-authentic” rant, go ahead and stop jacking off Lady Gaga. Go ahead. I’ll wait. Take your hand off of her dick. I don’t expect either of these to show up on her album due out later this month, but you should hear them all the same.

First up, “Oh Say Can You See.” It’s not political or patriotic. Just beautiful.

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Next, try on a little “Pawn Shop Blues” and see how it fits. This has actually been on repeat on all of my devices for some time now. Whether this had been Lana or not, I would still be a fan. It’s just a good song.

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As I mentioned, she performed on SNL this weekend. I liked it. I don’t care who knows it.

I’m happy for her. So there.

Play

Live from New York, it’s Lana Del Rey & Daniel Radcliffe!

Set the DVR. It’s a geeked out/indie SNL this weekend!